I'm Not Coming But You Are

New research reveals that women are far less likely than men to have an orgasm during sex whether casual, repeated without intentions, or in a relationship. Ummmm, I hope none of the stimulus package is going to fund further research into this arena. (By the way, here is a great chart from propublica.org on what the stimulus plan really offers.) A stop by Starbucks on an afternoon would confirm this research in a min-second.

According to a post "The Orgasm Gap" on TheDailyBeast.com written by Hannah Seligson: "In a study to be published later this year by W.W. Norton in the book Families as They Really Are, researchers found that college women have orgasms half as often as men on repeat hookups (meaning hooking up more than twice) and only a third of the time in first-time hookups. And they concluded that a lack of sexual reciprocity could be a key reason for this orgasm gap. The study was conducted by a team of researchers from Stanford and Indiana University."

Further research explains why women are less likely than men to have orgasms even in committed relationships, although women report having 80% of the orgasms men have: men don't care.

Michael Kimmel, author of Guyland and a leading writer on men and masculinity, sees the male psychology on orgasms as comparable to housework: “Men don’t pull their weight on either front because no one makes them.” But he also sees sexual asymmetry as an impoverished view of sex.

Advice to my daughter and her friends: Be assertive in bed. Make a guy wear a condom and make a guy understand what brings you pleasure. Sex isn't just masturbation with a partner. Even casual sex offers an opportunity for intimacy. But I suspect this generation understands how to text message better than they do eye to eye, face to face, genitals to genitals.