Same Sex Marriage and the Need for Security

Every day on my way to work I pass a reservoir that is home to a pair of swans. Every spring they build a nest. And yesterday when I drove by, the two swans were gathered around six signets, tiny, gray, and vulnerable. I eagerly await the first day each spring when I get to see the babies, reminding me that although I might be way beyond child-bearing age, the cycle of life continues all around me. It's a humbling reminder.

There might have been a time when birthing babies was the primary reason why human beings hung out with each other. Unlike those signets which will be on their own by the end of the season, human beings require sustained care for many years. That accustoms us to being in a larger group, nudged here by a parent, a grandmother, there by a friend, later by a herd of peers.

We need each other desperately.

Our brains don't work well unless we are in nearly constant connection with other humans.

There is a reason why Ted Kaczynski became the unibomber.

This inability to be among living humans made Jeffrey Dahmer a serial killer.

Which brings me to same sex marriage.

Especially in this stressful, shamefully individualistic society, we need each other. We need each other and to find a mate, no matter what gender, race, age, or nationality, and to gain that ability to nest together makes so much difference. Why it makes us human!

Couples have each other to help solve problems, to nurture children and grandchildren, to provide care, and to share income. Are we nuts? Why shouldn't we shelter these relationships? Like all spiritual connections, when they work, they provide our communities with stability.

In New Hampshire today, the legislature and the governor came up with a compromise on same sex marriage and he will sign the modified bill. I urge everyone to write to his/her legislator, in Maine, in New Hampshire, thanking those men and women for their votes, in New York, in DC, and urging the other public officials to do the right thing: we need each other because we need to love.